Hindsight
by Kibethan
Summary: [Sequel to Blindsided] There’s a new surgery out that might be able to give Shuichi his eyesight back forever! But, Yuki, why don’t you want him to get it?


**Title**: Hindsight

**By**: Kibethan

**Disclaimer**: I do not own Gravitation. That right belongs to Maki Murakami. If I owned Gravitation things would be much different. :giggles creepily:

**Summary**: Sequel to Blindsided. There's a new surgery out that might be able to give Shuichi his eyesight back forever! But, Yuki, why don't you want him to get it?

**Half-warning**: This contains yaoi. What a surprise.

**Chapter 1**

**Big News**

"WHAT!?"

Shuichi turned his head to face the sound, a quizzical look on his face. Yuki didn't even look at him, his mind completely focused on what the person on the other side of the phone had said.

"What did you say?"

"You heard me, Yuki-san! There is a new surgery in the works; it could perhaps bring his eyesight back forever!" the person on the phone answered him excitedly. Yuki listened intently for a while as the optometrist talked animatedly about this new surgery and how useful it could be. Giving Shuichi back his eyesight forever was the best thing that Yuki could ever hope to happen. As soon as Yuki was even thinking about telling Shuichi about this miracle surgery, though, the phone conversation took a slightly more depressing turn as the optometrist started explaining everything that could go wrong in the surgery. Because it was a relatively new surgery, the risks of it were higher than usual, and, since it hadn't been performed very many times, there was a chance, albeit, a very slim chance that the patient being performed on could die.

For the first time since answering the phone, Yuki turned his complete attention to Shuichi. He had wanted so badly to be able to tell Shuichi that his eyesight might have a chance to be fixed, but now that he knew what could go wrong, he wasn't so sure that he should tell Shuichi about the surgery at all.

It seems obvious to Yuki that if Shuichi heard about the surgery, he would want to do it, no matter how many risks were involved, however if there was a chance of death, even a small one, Yuki did not want to take it.

Shuichi was still looking towards him, slight confusion written plainly on his face.

Yuki knew that Shuichi wished that he could see; it certainly was no secret. Shuichi had voiced his want everyday since the day he had moved in with Yuki almost six months ago. It hurt that he couldn't see, but that was life, and there wasn't anything that they could do about it except to hope that it might come back by itself.

At least, that's what they both had thought until Yuki had received this phone call.

Yuki continued to just stare at Shuichi, now ignoring the person on the phone who was still talking, not realizing that Yuki wasn't paying attention anymore.

"Yuki?" Shuichi asked quietly, tilting his head, "what's wrong?"

"Nothing's wrong, Shuichi." Yuki answered rather vaguely. He knew that if he wanted to remain being a good person in Shuichi's eyes, he would have to tell Shuichi about the surgery, but he really did not want to. He turned back into the receiver of the phone, interrupting the optometrist who had been continuing to talk the whole time without stopping. "It sounds like a very good thing, however, because it is still in its baby processes, the risks are just too large for me to take. Thank you for calling."

"Wait, Yuki!" Yuki hung up the phone, not finishing listening to what the eye doctor at the hospital had to say. Yuki could tell when Shuichi heard Yuki hang up the phone, as he immediately started asking him questions.

"Who was that, Yuki?" Shuichi asked, slightly suspiciously.

"It was nobody."

"But, Yuki, you were yelling! You try not to yell unless you have to. Who was it?" Shuichi pressed. Yuki decided to try and lie.

"It was just some damn telemarketer."

"But, you said, 'Thank you for calling.'"

Shuichi was getting smarter, and Yuki was pretty sure that Shuichi had a very good idea, if not a perfectly dead on idea, about what that telephone conversation had been about.

"Shuichi…"

"I want to get the surgery."

Bingo. Shuichi knew exactly what it was they were talking about, and, exactly as Yuki had predicted earlier, he wanted to get the surgery.

"How did you figure it out?" Yuki didn't even try to deny it anymore. Shuichi was more headstrong than most people gave him credit for, and Yuki knew that even if the phone conversation had not been about getting Shuichi's eyesight back, Shuichi would have thought that it was about that and would not have been able to be convinced otherwise.

"I could tell almost immediately by your tone of voice. Just call it another sense that I have that I can tell when people are talking about important things that involve me. But, actually, I think that a that bigger question that I currently have in my head is why you weren't going to tell me about it!" Shuichi accused him.

Yuki shot a glare at him, but it fell short when he realized that Shuichi still couldn't see it.

"Because there are major risks involved." Yuki answered shortly.

"There are always risks involved," Shuichi shot straight back at him. Yuki could tell that Shuichi was incredibly pissed off because he had tried to hide something so important from him. So what that Yuki hadn't been planning on telling him about the surgery right away? Yuki knew that eventually he would have mentioned it; he just had wanted to get used to the idea that if Shuichi did decide to go through with this surgery, as he was sure that Shuichi would have done, that he could die.

"You don't seem to understand, Shuichi, the risks that exist in this operation can be grave. Dying seems like way too high of a risk, just to get your eyesight back. Besides, even if I was okay with you dying just to get your eyesight back, this is an expensive surgery. How were you planning on paying for it?"

Shuichi looked like he had been slapped because of the two main comments that Yuki had just made.

"Too high of a risk just to get your eyesight back?! You have **no** idea how hard it is to live being blind! I can't see anything, Yuki! I can't see the trees, I can't see the birds, I can't see the colors, and I can't see you! I tell you this every day! I believe that there is no risk that is too high if I could be able to see again. Even death! You cannot understand these feelings because you have never been blind and therefore have no idea how it feels! As for how I was planning on paying for it, I would find a job."

"So, you don't care if you die? Death is a very permanent thing, Shuichi. When you die you do not get to come back. There is no do-over and there is no happy ending! And just where were you planning on getting a job. I thought that given our current conversation you had realized it, Shuichi; you are _blind_. I can't think of anybody off the top of my head that would hire a blind person," Yuki pointed out cruelly.

Yuki was shaking now from anger; Shuichi didn't care if he died. Didn't he realize that if he died that he would be leaving Yuki behind? Even if Yuki hardly admitted it out loud, he liked having the pink-haired male in his house, and, even though he certainly had never admitted it, because it was way too out of character for him, if Shuichi left him or died, he would be completely devastated.

Shuichi stared at Yuki, for once completely speechless. His wide violet eyes started filling up with hurt and tears from the words that Yuki had just spoken out loud. He spun around and ran into the bedroom, slamming the door behind him loudly. Yuki heard the loud creak as Shuichi threw himself face down onto the bed, the blankets only slightly muffling his sobs.

Yuki took a few deep breaths where he was standing, trying to calm himself down, and then made his way to the living room and sat down heavily onto the couch. He hadn't meant it to come out so awfully, but Shuichi needed to hear the truth about the jobs and the death, even if Yuki hadn't been completely truthful about why it had bothered him so much that Shuichi would be so cavalier with his life. Yuki had figured that the only way he would get it into Shuichi's head would be if he had spoken it bluntly.

When the optometrist had initially called him, he had been ecstatic at the notion of Shuichi getting his eyesight back and he had almost burst from excitement, in a very stoic-Yuki way of course, to be able to tell Shuichi that there was a chance that his eyes could have surgery on them and he might be able to see again. But his bubble had quickly been destroyed when the optometrist had continued speaking and starting telling Yuki how risky the operation was.

And it had been at that moment that Yuki had decided that he didn't think that Shuichi should get the surgery.

Yuki turned so that he was lying stretched out on the couch, Shuichi's sobs still echoing down the halls from the bedroom. He knew that he and Shuichi needed their space to cool down so that they might be able to talk about the operation rationally. Maybe Yuki would even tell Shuichi the real reason he was didn't want him to get the surgery.

He sighed.

"I guess I'm sleeping on the couch, tonight," he murmured quietly.

**End Chapter 1**

AHHAHAHA, wow. So, yeah. I'm alive. Isn't that amazing? Sooo…I figured that some of you may have been not exactly as satisfied with the ending of Blindsided as I had hoped, and a few of you have asked for a sequel, so, here it is.

I can't exactly tell you what will be happening, mostly because I am not entirely sure myself. I will, however, attempt to keep a fairly regular update schedule, but this quarter is incredibly busy, so I won't make too many promises.

Anyway, this chapter is more of a prologue-y chapter.

Like, no like? Think that Shuichi should shave off all his hair and grow a pink mustache? Review and let me know!

-Kibethan


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